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Dog Jokes
A man runs
into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help.
The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him
put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines
the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man
that his dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly
agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second
opinion.
The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and
puts the cat down next to the dog's body. The cat sniffs the
body, walks from head to tail poking and sniffing the dog's
body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks
at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that
your dog is dead too."
The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead.
The vet brings in a black Labrador. The lab sniffs the body,
walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and
barks. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but
the lab thinks your dog is dead too."
The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet
and asks how much he owes. The vet answers, "$650."
"$650 to tell me my dog is dead?" exclaimed the man....
"Well," the vet replies, "I would only have charged you $50
for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600 was for the
cat scan and lab tests."
There were
two buddies one with a German Shepherd and the other with a
Chihuahua. The guy with the German Shepherd says to his
friend, "Let's go over to that restaurant and get something
to eat." The guy with the Chihuahua says, "We can't go in
there.
We've got dogs with us." The buddy with the German Shepherd
says, "Just follow my lead." They walk over to the
restaurant, the guy with the German Shepherd puts on a pair
of dark glasses, and he starts to walk in. The bouncer at
the door says, "Sorry, man, no pets allowed." The man with
the German Shepherd says, "You don't understand. This is my
seeing-eye dog." The man at the door says, "Come on in." The
buddy with the Chihuahua figures, "What the heck," so he
puts on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in. Once
again the bouncer says, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed." The
guy with the Chihuahua says, "You don't understand. This is
my seeing-eye dog." The bouncer at the door says, "A
Chihuahua?" The man with the Chihuahua says, "A Chihuahua???
You mean to tell me, that they gave me a Chihuahua?!"
A man went
to visit his 90 year old grandfather and while eating the
breakfast of eggs and bacon prepared for him, he noticed a
film-like substance on his plate. So he says, "Grandfather,
are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replies, "Those plates are as clean as
Coldwater can get them, so go on and finish your meal".
That afternoon, while eating the hamburgers his grandfather
made for lunch, he noticed many little black specks around
the edge of his plate, so again he asked, "Grandfather are
you sure these plates are clean?"
Without looking up from his burger, the grandfather says, "I
told you those dishes are as clean as Coldwater can get
them, now don't ask me about it anymore".
Well, later that day, they were on their way out to get
dinner. As he was leaving the house, grandfather's dog who
was lying on the floor started to growl and would not let
him pass. "Grandfather, your dog won't let me out".
Without diverting his attention from the football game he
was watching, his grandfather shouted, "Coldwater, get your
butt out of the way!"
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Free Westie
Desktop Wallpapers for Your Computer
Feel free to pass these on to all Westie
lovers!!
Wallpaper Instructions:
Click the link that is the closest to your computer
screen resolution under the picture you want. When
the picture loads in the new window, right-click on
the picture, and then click Set as Background
or Set as Wallpaper. The picture you
selected will now be the background picture (desktop
wallpaper) on your computer monitor!
We hope you enjoy
these free desktop wallpapers!
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Puppies
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